Nobody knows you. Not all of you and not all about you. You are a different person when you’re with your family than you are when you are with your friends. You’re completely different when you’re with people you work with. Or people who share a particular interest. None of these are a disguise. You’re not pretending to be someone else. They are all aspects of who you are.
When people do get to know at least part of you, it’s those glimpses of your other aspects that make you intriguing, that give you dimension. And it’s the lack of dimension that so many people exhibit in their online social interactions that make them completely boring. When you read a book or watch a movie and find that a character is flat, it’s because we don’t see those indications that they are interested in more than one thing and can appear differently when around different people.
I’m a polite Twitter user. I typically will follow someone if they follow me. But I look at their recent tweets first. If they’re all one-note I’ll typically pass. And I’ll unfollow anyone who just harps on the same thing over and over.
The worst of the worst are those idiots selling multi-level marketing and SEO secrets. I have no interest in seeing a steady stream of that. But I will follow someone who talks about marketing, and also talks about auto repair. Or cooking. Virtually anything. There’s a promise of an actual person inside and I find that interesting.
Frankly, I don’t need to know all about you, everything you’re interested in, everything that you do. But I’d like a hint of some of it now and again. That’s how I connect with people and I suspect that other people do this too.
You might need separate social aspects, different Twitter identities, with different followers and people you follow. Twitter doesn’t make this easy. Frankly, that’s something they need to work on. Your aspects don’t have to be hidden or secret, but having separate aspects can help you unleash those different parts of you. If you have just one side you show the world, you’re not showing them who you really are.
It doesn’t just have to be Facebook or Twitter, either. If you want to know my home theater aspect go look for me on the AVSforum.
Who am I? I’m a writer, both for business and for my own projects. I’m a husband. I’m a father of daughters. I’m a movie lover and home theater nut. I’m a voracious reader of science fiction, mystery, history, science, historical fiction and naval fiction, classics and plays (I could go on). I’m a playwright and actor and singer. I love music, not all kinds (but several different kinds from jazz to classical to rockabilly). I cook. I’m a Mac guy and virtually all things Apple. I’m a Trekkie. I’m an escaped farm boy. And I’m dozens of things more.
You can’t possibly be interested in all the things that I am or do. And I’m not that interested in many of the things that you care about. So why try and force everything into a single online presence? Or worse, why try and box yourself in, hide who you are, to try and appeal to a large group of strangers?
You are more interesting than that.
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Another very good post. Spookily relevant for me at the moment as well. Thank you!
You are welcome!
Very inspirational to me too in this moment in time!
This week, I started a venture. For one week I would agree to go everywhere I am invited. So far out of 5 days, I have been social for 4 of those days. I am a well-practiced introvert, so this is a complete turnaround for me! I find socialising very tiring, but I found myself feeling very unhappy with myself for always taking the easy way out, and denying opportunities.
This little experiment has freed me up so much, and it’s because I am making an effort, taking action, finally, instead of just thinking it over and over. I am showing those I care about who I really am.
That sounds like a great exercise. Good for you!
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